Wednesday 25 July 2012

How tall is Absorbing Man and where are the Houses of Parliament?

Greetings Earthicans,
Im here again to share some more delicious comic cover imagery from yester-year to astound and baffle your heightened, but barely adequate nerd-senses.
Comic covers are a work of art. They are a piece of social history. Some are so iconic that they echo down through the ages and become synonymous with the hero they represent, standing alone as a testemant to a classic moment in comic history.
Of course, in the 70s & 80s a comic cover often had little to do with what went on inside the comic. Spidey plummeting into a vat of toxic waste on the cover, might mean that Peter Parker chafes his hands on some rather rough paper toweling during the story and Hulk being bombarded with nuclear warheads on the cover, might mean he strokes a cow in a field.
So whats this about? Maybe they get hit by a giganto-ray during the comic?.... Nah... read it... doesnt happen. They fight, they smash, they fall off...

Oooo 'ang on a minute... I can remember Absorbing Man being 100ft high and fighting Thor... Nuff said.


And here is Mr. Nasty-and-balds first appearance waaay back in Journey into Mystery 114 (March 1965)

Aaaah, 'The Stronger I am, the Sooner I die!' what a tag-line. They just dont write them like that anymore.

Anyways, Spider-Man #95 (1971), check out the cover. LOVE IT!

Watch our Bobbies go! Leaping into action without a care for their own safety and with barely more than a wobble of the tit-like appendage on the top of their heads. Look at that one in the background. He's better than Spider-Man! Im glad the rest of the world see our police force as psuedo-superhuman tit wearers. It comforts me.
And that poor thug at the front is getting his ass handed to him Rodney King style, by our be-truncheoned constabulary, while Spider-Man is dodging bullets a-plenty as the gun-toting, goons hang from the windows of Tower Bridge and ride atop the double decker tour bus, whilst making tea for their Auntie.
Tour Guide:'Please ignore the terrorist on the roof of the bus firing a semi-automatic weapon at a costumed vigilante.On your left you will see the famous St. Catherines dock, and the Inn where Charles Dickens himself penned some of his classic, Victorian literature. On your right you can see Spider-Man and some policeman kicking the shit out of some man with a moustache.... Oh and theres Big Ben and the Houses of Parliament again....Didnt we pass the Houses of Parliament on Westminster Bridge?'
Since when were the Houses of Parliament next to Tower Bridge? Ok, American comic book artists, how would you like it if I drew Disneyland next to Disneyworld...? Eh? Eh?

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