Thursday 3 February 2011

Dusk till (soft) Porn

The lucky No.3 spot in our Top 10 Hot, Retro, Nerd, Babe Countdown is:


Ok. Now I might get some stick for giving this particular hot, babe the label: retro.
But... it was 15 years ago that my senses were first sexually assaulted by the vision that was Salma Hayek, emerging from a red, steamy aperture, with a symbolic, writhing, albino serpent, coiled sensually around her neck.
The little known name of her character was Santanico Pandemonium and the film was of course: Dusk till Dawn.

1996. Yes, that long ago. I remember having to wipe the saliva from my chin and lock myself in the toilet for 5 minutes, after that particular scene. She was nothing short of a fantasy vision, the like of which I thought was reserved only for when such artists as Frank Frazetta put pencil to paper. Just looking at her hips and thighs makes my hernia start to play up.
There is little more to say after that, other than express my utter disappointment at what she then became.

Errrrr.... Do any of you still recognise her? Yes, it is still Salma Hayek. Minus the whole lot woman flesh that made her the most sumptuous piece of pant arousing totty of the late 90s. When will the fashionistas of today realise that men do not like their women to look like pre-pubescent boys.
Well... men not of the clergy anyway.

Ok gents, loosen your pants and gaze in sexual awe at the Santanico Pandemonium snake dance!



Tune in to my next blog for some more nostalgic mammaries!
Big D out.

2 comments:

  1. Second only to Darth Vader striding onto the Blockade-Runner... Best Entrance Ever! The last few have been real belters, Mate. Keep it up... Err... you know what I mean.

    Me.

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  2. Yeah, some hardcore geeks might argue the 'retro' label. But fuck em, she's a fittie.

    ReplyDelete